The theme of this review is redemption. Redemption for John Marston and possibly redemption for Taco Bell because I’ll be reviewing their new cantina tacos.
First, the tacos. When I heard about cantina tacos from Taco Bell, I immediately got excited. It’s so obvious. Tacos are a delicious and inherently cheap food. Why is it that Taco Bell has been messing them up for so long when a good taco from almost any taqueria costs around $1.50 and tastes amazing? It seemed like there was hope for the chain yet. But, I thought, I’m sure they will find a way to screw it up and they sort of did.
First, the worst of the bunch. The carnitas pork taco.
This tasted like the insides of a slim jim were squirted onto a corn tortilla and slightly warmed. The texture wasn’t far off from what that would be like either. The pork wasn’t so much shredded as it was smashed into an unrecognizable paste. Absolutely terrible.
Next up, chicken.
As readers of this blog may know, I am not a fan of chicken tacos. They always seem to be the worst offering on any menu although they’re probably your safest bet at a place like Taco Bell. At first bite, this chicken taco didn’t change my mind. The chicken tasted like it had been pressed into neat little cubes. You know that eerily smooth uniform texture that most fast food meat has. Then it was rolled around in some cheap bbq sauce. However, I am biased against chicken so I decided to get a second opinion from someone who loves chicken tacos. He stated that they tasted like “sweaty armpits.”
Finally, the steak.
At this point you’re probably expecting another negative review, but surprisingly these weren’t bad. They had the same thing going on as the chicken (one weird uniform texture) but they weren’t chewy and the marinade wasn’t awful. If I was faced with eating at Taco Bell again I would not mind eating these. Do they spell redemption for Taco Bell? Maybe. But as I said in the beginning, with cheap delicious tacos being plentiful, I don’t know why I would choose these.
For comparison, I decided to have a crunchy beef supreme taco.
Awful. And this is coming from someone who loves Old El Paso taco night and Trader Joe’s Frozen Mini Tacos.
Now onto the game.
I played the shit out of Red Dead Redemption. I got 100% completion in about a month after first starting it. I am a big fan of Rockstar Games, specifically GTA and I have never once gotten 100%. Being familiar with the Grand Theft Auto format, I felt right at home playing this game. But the environments and the overall experience are what got me more involved. There is nothing like being a cowboy and riding off into the sunset. And shooting a bear just feels better than running over a pedestrian. It felt good to be John Marston and I can’t say that for any of Rockstar’s other characters. The only negative thing I have to say is that I finished the missions fairly quickly and didn’t experience much of the bugginess others had been complaining about, but once I was in free roam those problems really started to show to the point of frustration. Regardless, I continued to play even after the freezes or having to reset because I was stuck in a rock so they couldn’t have been that bad.
So how does it go with tacos? Excellently. Especially when you’re in Mexico. If Marston could have used tacos to refuel health, this game might have been perfect.
So, it’s been a little while (again) since I’ve posted from the Midwest. I know, I know, I have an excuse EVERY time. I have a really, really good one this time, but I’ll get to that later.
First, I’d like to address two very important things: Taco Bell taco trucks, and Taco Bell’s new attempt at cantina tacos.
Let me begin by saying that I haven’t yet tried Taco Bell’s cantina tacos, which actually look pretty darn appetizing. Last week a friend of mine posted Slash Food’s review of the Taco Bell cantina tacos on my Facebook, and another friend of mine, one Patrick Kelly, commented on the link by stating: “I’ve had them twice in the last two days…For fast food, they’re actually pretty tasty. Each one comes wrapped in foil with a little piece of lime wrapped up in there. I kinda wish they were flour instead of corn tortillas, but you could definitely fool anyone into thinking you went somewhere other than Taco Bell.”
I’m interested in trying them, but I’ve been feeling some hesitation as of late with regards to ingesting Taco Bell food. Recently, I saw a commercial for a Taco Bell promotion which was offering a set of four $2 meal deals which included a 5 layer burrito, a medium soda, and a bag of Dorritos. Now don’t get me wrong, as an American I’m super pro on values, but when a small bag of Dorritos at the store costs a dollar, and a soda costs almost two, why am I getting what is essentially a FREE 5-Layer burrito? That’s FIVE layers of food for nothing. Not for 5¢, or a high-five, or a can of old tomato soup for the poor. A free burrito. That’s fucking disgusting. At least give me the illusion that I’m getting something valuable for my value, and not old, grey, under hangings of the beef, and E-Coli grade lettuce. Pretend like it’s so delicious I should want to pay more than $2 for a reasonable amount of food. But hey, maybe I have it backward, and I’m paying $2 for a burrito, and it’s the chips and soda that I’m getting for free. And in that case, it’s a hell of a deal.
Which brings me to the best deal, the free Taco Bell taco truck (they have a Twitter?) that was spotted all around the San Diego Gas Lamp district during ComicCon. I know guys, didn’t I just spend a paragraph of your life (and mine) on a stupid diatribe on Taco Bell under charging for their crappy food, and now I’m all pumped about them giving me the cheapest of meals? Free isn’t cheap. Free is free. And when you get something for free, your awareness of the chance you are taking is inherent in your decision to accept the gratis goods. These tacos were free, about par with the standard to which I hold Taco Bell, and didn’t make me sick, so chalk up a win rather than a striking case of hypocrisy.
I have heard a rumor that the trucks aren’t just to get Taco Bell back into the public favor (although the Cantina tacos are an awfully loud cry to regain, or gain, credibility), but that Taco Bell is just checking to see if there is a fair public response to the advent of a Taco Bell taco truck. If the people approve, they shall have even faster food. If the people protest, Taco Bell will return to it’s drive through status. Anyway, the free tacos were tasty, but I’d rather buy food from a real taco truck any day of the week…and I fucking WISH that Minneapolis would get with the trucks now that they are legal.
Jesus.
Anyway, while on my jaunt to the South West I made a vow to eat every and any taco that presented itself to me, which is to say that I didn’t have a choice when it came to the Taco Bell taco truck anyway, but also means that when I arrived at the Houston airport for my layover, I had no other possible course of action than to eat airport tacos at Pappasito’s Cantina. I mean, you have to admit, it looks like a pretty awesome time.
They had every beverage you could possibly desire (they serve the devils drink at the airport food court in Houston, so add bottled beers to the list of other things to find in Texas, such as steers, and queers), and it looked like they were freshly grilling their taco meat. I was so excited to have a real taco at a locale typically reserved for fast-fooderies.
How blind I was! The tacos were over priced, served in giant flour burrito wraps, and filled to the brim with oily ground beef. I’ll admit that they hit the spot, but weren’t the kind of food you want to be eating before sitting for five hours on a plane. My bad.
The sides were really, really delicious, though, and Pappasito’s really touched my heart with their sprig of fresh cilantro. Anyway, it beat having another boring old hamburger, or over priced sandwich from Starbucks.
Finally, although it’s not a formal review, I’d like to give a “shout out” (did I use that term right?) to Rettew’s catering in Lancaster, PA for catering our wedding with such awesome tacos, and such delicious gazpacho. Everyone loved the food, and Bob and I really regret not getting to eat more at the reception. We were kind of busy…but what we had was super tasty!
Alright, now I’ll tell you why I’ve been slacking on my taco review duties. With our recent acquisition of a Playstation 3, and the wise purchase of the contemporary classic Heavy Rain, I haven’t been getting much of anything done. Or, I hadn’t until I finished my first play through of this mind-blowing game.
At first, I thought the game was awfully boring, and just an example of a video game company making some intricately structured controller-centric game to display the “future of gaming,” and to flaunt the things that they can do. Sort of like 2012, but with video games. But then, about half way through the game, it got really really good, and I could hardly stop playing it to even go to work. I was just itching to know what was going to happen.
I’m not really sure how much to say about Heavy Rain without giving anyone thinking about getting the game preconceived notions about it. I also don’t want to ruin the plot. What I will say is that everything you do, all the choices you make, effect the outcome, and there are 20 different endings- some of them really, really sad and some of them disgustingly happy. Although, it doesn’t strike me that the way you actually play the game affects the outcome, like Silent Hill 2 where if your fighting style was up-close with melee weapons, and you waited until James Sunderland was almost dead to heal, your ending would be the tragic suicide ending, but rather Heavy Rain’s endings revolve more around a set of specific decisions and encounters. I haven’t read up yet on Quantric Dream, and how they dealt with the choose-your-own-adventure -style mechanism of the game, but I’m planning on it. I’ll report back if it’s interesting.
But seriously, if you haven’t played Silent Hill 2, get on it.
Currently I’m working on a second play through, but I’m finding the drudgery of the first half just awful, having already played it myself, and watched someone else play it. I’m really trying not to just look up all of the endings.
After all, I’ve got plenty of other games on tap.
What’s with this video game review, smack in the middle of this taco blog? Well, we’re working on a new content format. We here at All the Tacos were thinking that there is so much more awesome stuff to love and discuss than just tacos, why not talk about it all, especially video games? But don’t worry, we’ll still be hitting you with the hardcore taco reviews you’ve grown to know, love, respect, and envy.
Whoa, this post has been majorly delayed because I’ve been in a happiness coma for the past 2 weeks. The west coast is a good time for tacos. Unfortunately, while I was in San Diego I only got to visit two locations: Tin Fish Gaslamp and Pokez.
First up, Tin Fish. I’m sure this place is the type of place that locals bemoan and tourists love. It’s situated right next to the convention center and PETCO Park. If I went out of town, I bet I could find a better fish taco but since I wasn’t able to on my trip, I absolutely loved this place. There is ample outdoor seating which is great for people watching and enjoying the weather. The only problem is everyone else has the same idea so during a busy time like con it can get really crowded. I think we waited 45 minutes for tacos. Luckily, we had great seats and the tacos are worth the wait. I got the grilled Mahi Mahi tacos which were stuffed and juicy. For any trip to downtown this place is a must for the atmosphere alone but it’s also got decent food to match.
Next up, Pokez which has the exact opposite vibe. It’s a locals heavy place also downtown, but a ways from the convention center. I kept hearing people talk about how the service is terrible, but that was not my experience. On the outside, it definitely has a too cool vibe because it’s run by a younger group of people. But I’ve always found that if you’re not a douche and you don’t have a demanding attitude of your servers, people will treat you in kind. (Although we accidentally ended up being douches in the end because we under-tipped our awesome waiter. So, dude who we handed our card to, many apologies for us sucking at math! We owe you a drink next time we’re in town.) Also, the place sets out chips and salsa for you which I’ve noticed not many places do anymore. So how terrible can their service really be?
We had a feast at Pokez. I ordered the chille relleno and carne asada taco combo with a beef taco on the side. Courtney had a tofu potato and mushroom taco which she fell in love with. The combination seems a little weird but apparently goes together crazy well. And as an impulse order she added on a shrimp cocktail which was massive! I’d never seen anything like it. This place is just rad. All of our food was amazing. Everyone seems like they’re having fun. I wish it was my second home.
Courtney and I had a blast in San Diego. It really opened our eyes to new taco worlds. So much so that the focus of this blog will be changing. Stay tuned for more on that.
About us:
We are two ladies who love tacos and want to share that love with the rest of the world.